One thing you need to know is that I have a love/hate relationship with my downstairs closets. I fill them up with stuff, and then when I open the door, the closet spits the crap right back at me. I am tired of having all this stuff falling on my head when I try to cram more crap into the closet. This past weekend, I decided to get going on cleaning out the closets, and as a result I made four huge bags of crap (along with a really big wicker hamper, and a tea-cup display rack) to donate back to the place from whence they came – the thrift store.
I have had a large padded envelope floating around the car and then the house for a while, and I came across it again during my “rip it apart and clean out the closets saga” this past Saturday. I put the envelope aside and filled it with a few things for my mom and dad: some Beanie Babies (bought as toys for the dogs from a yard sale – cheap!), some pinbacks for my dad’s collection, some Mary Kay samples from a friend, and a book or two. Or, so I thought.
Here is the conversation I had with my mom yesterday afternoon:
Me: Hey mom, what’s shaking?
Mom: We got the package in the mail today. I really appreciate the Mary Kay stuff.
Me: That’s good, my friend Marcy’s sister sent it to me, but I know you like Mary Kay.
Mom: Your father really liked all of the pins too. His ball cap is covered with all of the pins we’ve collected for him. The hat weighs about 5 or 6 pounds! He says it’s too heavy to wear, so he’s going to start another cap.
Me: I figured he would like the pins. Did you like the little Beanie Babies? Misty will love playing with them.
Mom: Yeah, they’re cute. But, I have a question for you …. Why did you send the other thing?
Me: What thing is that mom?
Mom: Well, your father got a great laugh about it, but I’m kind of confused. Why would you send me a Tampon?
Mom: Yep, there was a Kotex Tampon in the envelope, too.
Me: Mom, that envelope has been floating around for a long time, so who knows how that happened.
Mom: Well, its still weird. What am I supposed to do with it?
Me: Throw it in the trash, it doesn’t matter.
Mom: No, I’ll save it for you or your sister. You can never have enough Tampons in the house, you know?
Me: Sure mom, whatever you decide.
Mom: Do you want me to mail it back to you? You might need it.
Me: No, don’t send it back, just leave it under the sink in the bathroom, ok?
Mom: Ok, if you’re sure you don’t need it back.
Me: Mom, which of the Beanie Babies did you like the best?
Mom: You’re weird, you know that?
Me [thinking … what’s that saying? “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.”]